[Written on December 11th, 2010]

I remember the exhilaration that came over me when I was in high school and the first watercolor I painted looked exactly the way that I wanted it to look. Something happened to me that day. I realized that day that I had art in my blood; that I truly was my mother’s daughter.  When I was in college I decided not to be an art major, but that didn’t stop me from spending hours upon hours, back to back and without meals, just me and my paint brushes, consumed by the canvas and the world appearing on it.

Today I had an abundance of time and so I fell back into an old habit; I picked up the paint brush instead of the camera.   I stroked the brush slowly against the texture of the wall, watching the paint cling to the brush and then release onto the surface of the wall with such grace, such beauty.  It amazed me how easy it was to let the time fly by again. To skip a meal.  To fall back into a world that welcomed me with open arms.   I was happy.
As I completed the mural that I had been dying to do for Dayla’s bedroom wall since we moved in,  I felt like I fell into a dream.

Today I painted and it was the best painting I have ever done. Not because of the subject matter, or heaven knows, not because of the technique.  It was not for a museum, or an art show. It was the best painting I have ever done because I was painting it for her.  It was commissioned by and painted for just one little girl.

I don’t think painting will ever become anything more than a hobby, and if you ask me I will tell you, I wouldn’t want it any other way.  Truly. I love my photography job with all my heart, and I love painting as a hobby for the most beautiful little girl in the world.  I feel like I have been given the best of everything, and I am so so happy.

In action.

The final product.

I am kind of an “all or nothing” kind of girl.  I am either in over-drive or OFF.  That is just how I fly.  No middle ground for me.

My first business cards were the “I am hoping this business takes off but I am scared so I don’t want to spend any money”  business cards.  Now, three years later, with a whole lot of God and a lot of love from people like you, business is happening. A complete DREAM COME TRUE.  And now that we are rocking and rolling it means it is time to upgrade to the “I am actually a real photographer and I this really is a business” business cards.

WOOHOO!

But as you can imagine that when I set out to get new business cards, it was a journey to say the least.  They had to be “ALL”.  No middle ground for me.

Now here we are, nearly a year after I set out to get them,  I found a company who will make every card in my stack different, and to me that is “ALL” because that means they are ALL YOU!

Drum roll please……..

Introducing the new Sundin Photography Business cards…

Thank you so much, ever amazing Moo.

And did you notice their packaging?  I LOVE MOO!

Crickets.  When I posted on my Facebook page In 2011 I will…I was certain it would explode with ideas that I could steal, I mean borrow. See, I am not really a resolution person (that is a whole other blog post that I promise not to write), but I was actually contemplating one this year.  Unfortunately for my new-minded self, all I kept seeing in my head for 2011 was a blank slate. So that was when I thought I would turn to you for some ideas and. all. I .got. were. crickets.  Then the thing I was dreading most happened: I had to actually sit down and think about what I would want this year. UGH.

Blank slate. White.  Nothing.

I am a dreamer.  And a planner.  I used to think those were opposite personalities types, but I realize now more than ever, that I am a lot of both. Basically I dream something up, then make a plan to make it happen. See?  Hand in hand.

Contrary to how I would plan for it to be, I have been learning for two years now, that the best dreams and plans are not always mine.  They are nothing unless they are also His. For me this has been a LONG two year lesson. It turns out that letting go of dreams and plans is hard for me, but God knows that, and that is why He is using my two year wait to grow me.  So I keep trying to picture myself as this stubby little green thing, that when it is done growing will be a beautiful flower…and that I should hunker down and try to enjoy this growing process.

Then. it. hits. me.

That is my goal for 2011:   To just enjoy the growth. (Call it a resolution if you must.)

I don’t feel like it is a resolution as much as it is looking at this year ahead and, for the first time in my life, I am trying to see nothing but a blank slate, and to be okay with that. And to enjoy the growth that comes.

**Posted in effort to keep myself accountable. I recognize that my goals and resolutions may be of no interest to you….and I am okay with that.  That being said, I AM interested in YOURS. So share away in the comments if you have one!

What are your goals for this year?  Let’s let the world of the “the internet” hold you and I both accountable….if you dare.**

Many days the walls remind me of an asylum. It is not good on the days when I am already feeling a bit crazy. It seems to feed the craziness…giving me an excuse to dance around with flailing arms without a care.

When we moved into our new house Daniel and I agreed to “take our time” in putting things on the wall, a decision I stand by, but at times can be a bit …well…WHITE. We spent 7 years in our apartment, but it never really felt permanent, it wasn’t home. Now we are HOME. And nothing excites me more than really making it “ours”. You know what I mean, putting as many nail holes in the wall as we want without a flinch or a flash forward to having to fill them all when we move out. It is a good feeling. The trouble lies in the deciding what is worthy to make nail holes for. And to make matters worse, it turns out that for home decor I have Versace taste on an Old Navy budget. A predicament for the decorator if you ask me.

Until NOW.

I have found Craigslist. Sure, I knew it existed, but I was always AWFUL at it. Then my friend Sarah gave me some valuable tips. And like the perfect storm, only days after getting those tips I had photo shoot at the most beautiful house I have EVER SEEN, a custom made home that was decorated by two artists who scoured thrift shops, garage sales and flee markets. AND I AM OFFICIALLY INSPIRED.

I CAN DO THIS.

Versace Taste. Old Navy budget. Item No. 1.

Isn’t it the most glorious lamp you have ever seen? I LOVE IT. And the price was so good, I practically stole it.

The first rain of the season, you know the one that makes the pavement smell, I love that rain.  The first kiss, who doesn’t love that?  The first snow, the way it rests on everything like a blanket of God’s glory, yeah…before you have to shovel it, it is breath taking.

Just like a fresh pot of coffee.  A pie fresh from the oven.  A fruit you have just picked off a tree…fresh…sweet…ripe…delicious.  Fresh is something I love.

I love the New Year.

Full of FRESH,  NEW, and FIRSTS.

Yes, Christmas is magical, but the New Year is a blank slate….a dream waiting to come to life….a story waiting to be told…a painting longing to unfold.  It makes me feel alive!

I love the New Year.

Happy Birthday Year.  I just want to tell you, I am ready for you, and  I can’t wait to see what you have in store.